28 January 2014

There's this woman who wrote this piece...

In case you haven't noticed, I'm really not one for social media. Yes I have a blog...yes I'm on Pinterest. I have Twitter but I really don't even know how to use it at this point. I don't have Facebook. So when I read a blog post about this woman...who wrote this piece...I wasn't surprised I hadn't seen that it had already gone "viral."  I don't even want to tell your her name, or link you over to her post because thinking that she will get more people to read what she wrote puts a knot in my stomach. But my opinions are useless unless I do, so you're welcome, Amy Glass. If you haven't heard about it yet (do you live under a rock like me?) then maybe I'll just tell you the title. "I look down on young women with husbands and kids and I'm not sorry" Awww...well isn't that sweet. I guess the good news is that she sure as hell isn't instilling the values of tolerance and acceptance into any little ones anytime soon.

You see, I have a few problems with what you've written, Amy. Let me start by saying, I don't really have many opinions on Feminism. You want to stand up for your rights and prove that you can do everything a man can do, more power to you. But when you start to lump far too many women into one group there, and make judgments on them, that, my friend, is when we have a problem. What's interesting about the title of your little piece is that your main complaint is actually that stay-at-home moms add no [real] value to society (only doctors and engineers, right?). You say that a stay-at-home-mom and a woman who work aren't on equal footing. We'll you're probably right there, I mean, if it were up to me I'd be at home all the time with my kid, not only taking care of myself (like you do), but also my child and my husband. But we're not all afforded that financial freedom, sometimes you do what you have to do.

And Amy, my friend, you also make it quite clear that you have no experience with children. You look down on women who think it's hard to manage a household and raise kids. Let me tell you, from my own humbling experiences, that even on my days off, having one child at home to take care of and trying to manage a household isn't the fluffy life you've laid it out to be. Although, perhaps I'm going about my thoughts all wrong here. My apologies that I've been conditioned to this that these tasks are "stupid"...just as men do, which is why they don't bother with it (I've learned from reading your piece). I probably should have ignored everything, left the house unkempt and allowed our little family to live in filth. Doctors and engineers add so much more to society, don't they? I'm sure they don't manage households either. And why have kids and reproduce? That should be left for the folks who don't contribute to society, too. That will set us up for success in the future, no? How silly I've been. To think that I needed to clean this to help "manage" my household. Foolish. I probably should have just left it, since I've learned now that I'm above needing to clean and manage a house.
And your thoughts on a woman being unable to be successful if she falls in love, wow...you have opened my eyes. I've learned, from you Ms. Glass, that I will never be great at something, because I have fallen in love, have a husband and yes, that's right...a child. I'll never be a great mother by your standards, because I can't give it my all, I have to go to work. I can't be great at my work because I have a kid. Oh, and I've also learned that being a great mother or wife really just means I'm the "supporting cast" in my own biography...because I am that woman who has been brainwashed to believe that being a faithful wife to my husband who works equally as hard as me, if not harder, and giving everything I have to being a mother every moment that I can is "stupid." I know, if I had a mind of my own and loved myself enough I would just leave and work 24/7...no need for a family, or love.

What's ironic is that I, much like you (I know, you don't want to admit it, right? That you and I, Amy, are alike in any way) am also in love with myself. I'm in love with my life, with my husband and my little boy. You're in love with building your work, which you say will outlive you. Well, I'm in love with raising my son who, God willing, will outlive me. I'm in love with the thought that my husband and I have the chance to raise a brilliant little mind, instill upon him the values that we believe and live in our every day lives. I'm in love with building my relationship and making it stronger and more successful every day. You're in love with proving people wrong. I'm in love with proving people wrong, too. People like you, Amy, who think that because you are happy and secure and the center of your own world (and don't have a husband OR kids and only dedicates life to working), anyone who has or strives for anything but that is wrong.

I'm sure that you think my little blog in this little corner of the world is a facade. A facade for a miserable life where I try to plaster smiles all over the place to prove to other people that I'm happy. The thing though, is that I am happy with who I am, with who my family is, with the fact that I am in love with my husband. That together we work our butts off to provide for our son. To one day get to that point where one, if not both of us can stay home with our kids. Just because you love you and your lifestyle doesn't make me and my lifestyle wrong. I love me, too. And I love my life (husband, kid and all...the whole nine ma'am).
Now if that isn't the face of true misery....what an ugly facade.

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